I haven't been sleeping well.  For a while.  Probably why I got sick... and now... mania... It's been coming on for a couple days now that I look back at it.  And the drugs for the asthma... trigger me... and not sleeping... and beginning work... and so much... stimulation. Today I had to work on … Continue reading Decisions

Bad Week

It's Friday night.  Sir came home a little while ago with K and J.  I got sent upstairs to do my blog.  I'm irritated about that.  And I'm irritated at the power dynamic in the house right now.  I'm trying to tell myself that I'm projecting because I'm pissed off about a power dynamic at … Continue reading Bad Week


There is an aspect of the BDSM D/s world called "service."  This, like everything else, means different things to different people.  In general it usually refers to a dynamic or aspect of a dynamic in which the submissive does a type of service for the dominant... like... housekeeping, cooking meals, bringing drinks and rubbing feet, … Continue reading Service


Sir is going to meet with K on Friday night.  He's going to get beaten.  It's a thing they do, and... I've made peace with it in the past, but this time it's upsetting me.  Sir and I have talked this through and he wants me to write about it now. I talked to Sub … Continue reading Weary


I had a rough patch for a few days.  Therapy went hard and I went into a spiral and for some reason (I'm sure therapy could explain it) I became almost intolerably self-critical for several days. And I know it's easy for people to scold or dismiss my self-criticism.  It's easy to say, "You're too … Continue reading Slider