Sir smacked my butt tonight because I said something stupid in the kitchen (stupid along the lines of - "Oh, maybe it's okay to eat these almonds that are coated with eggs, 'cause, maybe I'm not allergic to eggs anymore... I'll just try a couple or five handfuls and see...") Because I've been losing weight … Continue reading Shut Up, Brain!
I took down Sub Brother, and Sir is teetering. I'm not allowed to talk about it in those terms, but... it's true. My issues over the last six months have put a significant strain on the household. I've had many many days and nights of screaming flashbacks, sometimes lasting hours, or coming in clusters and … Continue reading Broken
Sir and Sub Brother had their date night tonight (eventually I'll write about our date night system... We basically have a set up so everyone gets one-on -one time with everyone else a couple times a month.) I was supposed to wash my laundry and feed myself while they were gone (for four hours, so … Continue reading Grateful
While I acknowledge that a triad relationship is innately very difficult (even more than normal relationships, which are hella, stupid hard), I sometimes think Sir has it the hardest. I'm sure the grass is always... harder...? on the other side, but... We had a rough weekend. We've all been sick, like, seriously, passing viruses around. … Continue reading Being Sir
"Girl, come here, I need you." I wipe my hands on the towel hanging from the over door and walk into the living room. Sir is on the couch, the light from the TV flickers over his face, making his eyes glitter. "Yeah?" My hands are still damp and I wipe them on my jeans. … Continue reading Need (Moments with Sir)
Someone asked how I identify with the guys in my life... so... I don't really know. But I guess I consider Sir and SB my family. Sort of. I still am not totally sure but for now that seems like an okay definition. We're a coalition of some sort. K and J are friends. I … Continue reading Family
What emotions do you feel during a punishment? Wow, this is already hard, and it's just the first question. Emotions can be different in different situations and at different stages of the punishment, but almost always sadness, anxiety, sometimes fear or panic at a certain stage. After being punished, a little while after I often … Continue reading Q & A Punishment