I'm having anxiety. Probably because I ate a bunch of eggs the last three days. I'm allergic to eggs. Though, technically, not... because I don't have an IgE reaction to them. I don't have an IgA reaction, either, I don't think... at least the last test didn't show one. Despite modern science, however, my body … Continue reading Anxiety
Ugh! I was diagnosed with pernicious anemia a couple of weeks ago (on top of iron-deficient anemia). That means that my body makes antibodies to the cells that line my stomach. The cells which produce stomach acid and intrinsic factor. Intrinsic factor is a protein which binds to B12 (the vitamin) and allows it to … Continue reading Needles!
There is an aspect of submission called "service." Not all submissives are oriented to service. Not all dominants are oriented to service. Individual people might be more or less oriented toward service. And it can be a person's entire orientation, or only one of several or many orientations as a submissive/dominant. Sub Brother is pretty … Continue reading Being of Service
Sir smacked my butt tonight because I said something stupid in the kitchen (stupid along the lines of - "Oh, maybe it's okay to eat these almonds that are coated with eggs, 'cause, maybe I'm not allergic to eggs anymore... I'll just try a couple or five handfuls and see...") Because I've been losing weight … Continue reading Shut Up, Brain!
I took down Sub Brother, and Sir is teetering. I'm not allowed to talk about it in those terms, but... it's true. My issues over the last six months have put a significant strain on the household. I've had many many days and nights of screaming flashbacks, sometimes lasting hours, or coming in clusters and … Continue reading Broken
Well... Not that I'm on the outside or anything, but I've at least crawled high enough up the side of my hole to have some perspective on its depth... That's a fucking deep hole! This summer has been... probably the worst of my life since I was a kid. And, in some ways, it triggered … Continue reading Hell Hole
I had therapy today. I'm supposed to increase my PTSD med. Apparently I'm not doing well. But, I was supposed to increase it on my own a week ago. I was supposed to increase it by 1 mg every week for four weeks unless I felt I was doing fine at a certain dosage, then … Continue reading Perception