I’m in a lot of trouble. It seems to be that kind of season…
I got punished after work today, and I’m getting punished again tonight, and I’m banned from Facebook indefinitely.
And I feel incredibly lonely.
I’m very stressed about being punished.
And I’m very ashamed. I’m ashamed of this aspect of my relationship and my dynamic. I feel it is the hardest for anyone to relate to. It makes me feel incredibly alone, because… literally no one I know has the same dynamic I have.
And at times like these when I am scared, and anxious, and nervous, and sad… I most want to talk to someone… to connect with another human being… to have people, and a community.
I’m grateful for the amazing people I do have, who can be supportive and loving even without understanding it…
And this isn’t to besmirch any of the awesome love you all send my way. I would well and truly be lost without you.
But sometimes it’s just so hard to… to know no one can relate.